Week 2: "To This Day, Nobody Knows if Hermit Crabs Poop"

Your blog title this week is brought to you by the weird things that come out of Peyton's mouth commission.

It was the last week of summer vacation here in the Waterstraut household. While some years I feel the staples 'it's the most wonderful time of the year' commercial is appropriate here, I think this year was different for two reasons. 1. Hayden is off to school, and I don't know what to do with myself 2. We had such an awesomely epic summer, it's sad to see it end.

Last Tuesday Hayden got registered for kindergarten. Such a sad, sad milestone. What will I do with all my kids in school? Five to Six hours a day, just me. It blows my mind that I could just go out and not have to say anything to anyone. This hasn't happened since I was like, a freshman in college. And, actually, thats the only time it ever happened. It'll be an adjustment, with pro's and con's, I'm sure. Pro: Nobody to mess up everything I clean up. :) Con: Nobody to mess up everything I clean up :(

This week Hayden invented strawberry tacos. Now before you all run right to your recipe box to add this thinking it's some cool new recipe I came up with, just know Hayden made this up all on his own. And, he's related to the guy who invented fat sandwiches (don't ask). Anyway, It was just a taco, complete with tomatoes, meat, cheese, and sour cream, and then added strawberries. Not one or two, no this is Hayden. His life motto whether he knows it or not is go big or go home. It's in his genes. Well, actually his motto is pretty much just 'go big in EVERY SINGLE THING YOU DO'. His weirdness continued into the night, while we were all in the living room doing our own thing, he came out with a broom, using it as metal detector. Beep....... Beep...... Beep....... BEEPBEEPBEEP.... He didn't talk to anyone else, he didn't involve anyone else. He just very seriously and intently looked for, and found some buried treasure.

With Hayden going to school, Calib and Peyton felt the need to start to tell him about what his daily life would be like. Peyton was talking about how Hayden is going to have to say the Pledge of Allegiance everyday. Haydens response: Whats the Pledge of Alliance? (Yes, alliance). Peyton then went on 'I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of american, and to the republic for whiches stands, one nation, under god, invisible for liberty and justice for all'. I tried to correct him, but he just wasn't having it. I thought people only messed that up in bad sitcoms, like saved by the bell. Oh no, folks. My kids are a bad sitcom.

We also made sponge bombs (not to be confused with sponge bob, the one with the square pants.)They are pretty much the concept of water balloons, without the broken balloon mess all over the yard. Plus you can use them over and over again. It's a genius idea, really. If By genius you mean something only the moms who would have to pick up said mess would appreciate. We also glow stick lanterns, they didn't last so long though. It was more like glow stick flashes of light.

Wednesday was meet the teacher day. This is the first day the boys find out what class they will be in and which one of their friends will be in the class with them. We were really hoping Peyton would have Calibs teacher from last year, there was a celebration of jumping up and down and high fives when we saw he did. She really works with the kids, and doesn't overload on homework (which Peytons teacher really did last year. Two to three hours of homework is WAY too much for third grade). The bad news came when Peyton noticed his best friend wasn't in his class. We went back to the board on our way out to check and see which class he was in, and we couldn't find him in fourth grade. Apparently, he didn't pass the FCAT and stayed in third grade. I felt really bad for Peyton, but we told him ALL year how important it was to pass the FCAT or he wouldn't go on to fourth grade. This is a good lesson for him, I suppose. Still, that stinks.

Also, at school they have pods, different animals represent different area's of the school. This way you always stay with the same kids and get the feel of a much smaller school than the nearly 1000 kids that are there. Hayden should have been in the Rays like Calib and Peyton, but for some reason he got put in the dolphins (on the bright side at least I don't have to worry about him getting Peyton's third grade teacher). Later that evening I overheard a conversation between Calib and Hayden, it went something like this:

Hayden: I'm a Shark.

Calib: No Hayden, you're a dolphin.

Hayden: I'll just pretend to be a shark then. It's pretty much just a mean dolphin with a lot more teeth.

Calib (patronizing): ok Hayden.

Hayden: Sharks can eat Rays, Calib. Remember that.

For Arts and Crafts this week (yes, I'm that mom) we made finger puppets out of those little pom pom things and pipe cleaners. Now, question, has anyone ever actually used a pipe cleaner to clean a pipe? And if so, why do you need neon colored ones. I'm fascinated by where in the heck the term pipe cleaners came from. Either way, they're super easy to make finger puppets out of. Just curl them around the top of your finger, hot glue a pom pom to the top for the head, and then add assorted googly eyes and such. Wha-La! We also made everyones name out of Popsicle sticks. They are pretty funny because they're kind of all over the place. I try really hard not to do these sorts of things for them though. Thats one of my biggest pet peeves. One day we were at the childrens museum and a lady kept correcting them on how to build this tower out of big blocks. And then she gave me a dirty look like 'aren't you going to help them'. Yea, ok lady, this is why your kid couldn't figure out how to do anything on his own.

I also discovered the joy that are koolade slushies this week. Ok, heres the recipe. It's really complicated, so take notes. You put a koolade packet, some sugar, water and ice in a blender. Here'es where it gets really complicated. You blend and pour. Although Koolade slushies are not nearly as good as Lemonade slushies. I'm partial to the lemonade ones though, mostly because I'm a grown up. And, grownups don't like Koolade. Unless you're feeling nostalgic. It's like tang, drink it once to remember your childhood. And then let it sit there till it gets all gross and clumpy and think about what other gross things you ate/drank as a child and would no longer subject yourself to. Like, Peanut Butter and Miracle Whip. Oh yea, that happened.

Friday was payday, which meant spending money on all the boring stuff that is school supplies. It amazes me the stuff we have to bring in, and the amount of it. Ziplock baggies in tons, 20 pounds of glue sticks, and a 2 year supply of baby wipes. Also not to be forgotten the packages of bandaids, batteries, and playdough. It was just a weird mix of things this year. I also had to buy three pairs of shoes and three backpacks, which was odd. Filed under the not awesome category: spending $300 on new shoes and school supplies. Filed under the awesome category: getting the Kohls cash when you buy all that. I guess I have some plans for later this week.

This weekend, I was playing Tetris Attack on the Nintendo 64, because we're that awesome, we have super awesome game consoles. I got to level 76, which met my goal on my 31 things to do before I turn 31. I was super excited. Hayden: What do you win? Me: The satisfaction of knowing I can still do it. Hayden: *sigh* Lame. Two days later I got to level 99 (the highest you can get to) and Peyton just kept talking about how tetris is the stupidest game ever, because you can't actually win. He told me I was just setting myself up for failure.

Saturday night we had a housewarming shindig for our friend Justin. He moved into his house when we were in Alaska, so we were just now getting around to his housewarming. Heres the great part about being able to have a party and Justins. 1. I don't have to clean for it. 2. It's Justins house, and Justin is the closest thing to family we have in Florida, so I feel pretty much at home there. 3. I don't have to clean up after it. It was a good time. There were toys sold on the black market, wrestling matches which resulted in Rex's face being rubbed into the carpet by Calib, and random toys ending up in shoes. Yup, it was a pretty wild time.

For the last day of summer vacation we spent the morning at Busch Gardens. Peyton was finally able to ride a 54 inch ride. Although, the bad news there is I can't hang that over his head to get him to drink his milk anymore. We had lunch at Five Guys, which translates to Hayden had peanuts for lunch (and made a HUGE mess), and then went to Adventure Island. We convinced Justin to add adventure island to his pass so he could come with us. He only did, and purchased a swim suit when I told him to do so (because if Asa comes up with an idea it's harebrained. If I come up with an idea it's pretty much the best idea ever- this is how Justin ended up as a homeowner). Our friend Ann came with us too, so Asa had someone else to coerce into going down slides and jumping off cliffs. It worked pretty well, he didn't ask me to go once! My big plan was to tire the kids out so they would go to sleep early enough for school in the morning. Unfortunately, this totally backfired as they were laying on the couch at 6:30 falling asleep. They weren't allowed to go to their rooms for fear of them falling asleep too early. Peyton was not happy, every time he started to doze off, Asa and I would make an obscene amount of noise.

Monday was the first day of school. Or, as I call it, the day I got fired from my day job. Hayden

did really well, he didn't even mind that Asa and I were leaving. I was happy Asa got a work from home exception, so he could come along too. The traffic though, was seriously ridiculous. When we left the school it was 9:40- school starts at ten till 10. The cars were backed up nearly to our house, which is a little over a mile. Calib said it took an hour after school started for all the kids to get there. It's always worst the first day of school, but I had never seen it like that. Crazy! I spent the day keeping busy. I got to pick up the stuff we painted on my birthday, and they all came out really cool. Everyone had a good first day at school. When they got home we made bouncy balls, which is actually a very similar recipe to making slime- who knew? I just couldn't go a day without some random kid project. Mid school year I suspect I'll be making puppets and playdough by myself, I'll be so desperate.

Quotes of the week:

Hayden: 'Dad went to register me for kindergarten. I think he's at publix.'

Me: 'No Hayden, he's at school.'

Hayden: But, I know theres a register at Publix. I don't think theres one at school'.

Quote: Hayden: Sometimes it's weird when I walk

Peyton: So you're drunk?

Hayden: Uh... Drunk? No, I'm Hayden.

Me: Why does Peyton know you can't walk if you're drunk?

Asa: Uhh.. I might have told him stories.

Peyton: School lunches just aren't going to be the same.

Me: Why ?

Peyton: Nobody makes me smiley faces out of vegetables and owls out of sandwiches. I even have to open my own milk. It's really a huge step down from the cruise ship.

Next Up: Trying to figure out how to entertain myself for about 5 and a half hours a day.

Also, pictures are being dumb again. But, I uploaded a bunch to facebook so you can also see them there!